is it too late to wrap myself up like a baby and drop myself off on a billionaire’s doorstep
someone’s job is to sit there and write clean lyrics to raunchy songs for kidz bop
YOU KNOW HOW BABIES GET ALL QUIET AND CALM WHEN THEY SEE A MOBILE
SO APPARENTLY THEY DO THIS BECAUSE THE MOBILE RESEMBLES BIRDS OF PREY FLYING OVERHEAD THAT COULD POTENTIALLY CARRY THEM OFF
IT’S A EVOLUTIONARY PRECEDENT SO THAT IF THE BABY STAYS STILL THE BIRD WON’T NOTICE AND EAT IT
BABIES DON’T LIKE MOBILES
THEY’RE FUCKING TERRIFIED
I am more than a bit disturbed by how hard I laughed at this.
I LOVE THIS
- everyday: i need new clothes
Do you think celebrities just have each others phone numbers and like Miley Cyrus will just text beyonce and be like “dude I want Mac and cheese so badly rn lol”
everyone is embarrassed of their fourteen year old self trust me if you’re fourteen right now you will regret whatever it is that you are doing at this moment
What, being a SuperWhoLockian, Tumblrian, and just being generally pretty good? I don’t think so.
screenshot this and look at it in 3 years
Everyone SAYS they want a fairytale wedding but when I show up and curse their firstborn suddenly I’m a jerk.
i hate it when adults assume i’m on the internet all the time by choice. if i had enough money to travel around and etc, do you think i would be withering away my youth behind a computer screen you useless paperclip.
when you say that you’re going to bed but then you see a thing you want to reblog
I don’t understand Christmas movies where Santa exists and the adults don’t believe in him. Because if he exists in the story, that means he’s delivering presents to everyone, including the kids of the skeptical adults, and so those skeptics must be sort of confused about all the gifts under the tree that they didn’t buy.
Biggest plot hole in history ^