i-once-had-a-guy-tell-me:

I once had a drunk guy tell me I was too sexy to be shooting up at a party. He knocked the needle out of my hands and stepped on the pen, shattering the casing, telling me I should thank him by giving him my number and a kiss. It was my diabetes medicine.

(submitted by anonymous)

solarsenpai:

mostly-perfect:

So one time my dad bought a skeleton for Halloween, and one day he decided to place it in the kitchen to scare me and it went too far…

LMAO PERFECT

majortvjunkie:

do I focus on the long arm or shit yourself

majortvjunkie:

do I focus on the long arm or shit yourself

intensional:

a day before a test and the only question i have is what did we learn

the-awesome-adventurer:

the-awesome-adventurer:

the-awesome-adventurer:

I think the snapchats of my math teacher are the only thing I’ll be remembered for and I’m okay with that

I got suspended, Thursday school, and moved to an entirely different classroom because of this post.

I JUST FOUND OUT THEY BANNED SNAPCHAT ON MY SCHOOLS SERVER BECAUSE OF THIS OMFG

uglychat:

when u sleepy as hell but ur teacher wont let u put ur head down image